Eat the Doritos*

Chips

Last year a friend was telling me how she had fallen off the fitness wagon.  She was busy with work and her kids and her life was consumed with normal life things.  Then she told me that the week prior a friend of hers was diagnosed, at age 30, with ALS.  She was so sad about this news and she said to me “I know that I need to stay fit and healthy and on track, but sometimes, I just want to eat the Doritos.”

Last week this same friend buried her mother.

This week one of my closest friend’s father passed away from a sudden massive stroke.

Several weeks ago my brother was injured badly in a motorcycle accident.  He just returned home a few days ago after spending 16 days in the hospital.  He’s very fortunate and blessed to still be with us, but he’s got a long road of recovery ahead of him.

Needless to say, the last few weeks have been overwhelming with so many tragic and stressful events all heaped together.  And believe me, I wanted to eat the Doritos!  All of them.  Well, maybe not Doritos but I certainly wanted to bury my emotions in chocolate.  And maybe I did…a little.

I am a very emotional person and I am a bit of a crybaby and sometimes when I’m trying to hold it all together I feel more and more like I’m going to fall apart.  I felt that way a bit with my brother’s accident.  He is a very strong person, physically.  He always has been.  He lifts weights and he boxes and runs and bikes and he wrestled.  He’s done it all.  And seeing him in such a state of vulnerability and completely busted and broken was, not only terrifying, but also a bit unknown to me because I don’t recall ever seeing him like that. (Not that he didn’t still have his moments of being an ass!)  So I buried most of my fear and sadness inside, had a breakdown once or twice, and then spent the rest of the time eating chocolate – followed by regular workouts.  Because I’m a bit of a freak and it seems that exercise is really the best way for me to get my aggression out.

Life is about balance.  There are times when you need comfort and sometimes food is the only place you can (or want to) find it.  And that is okay.  It’s about moderation.  You can have the Doritos, you can have the cake, you can have the Tim Bits.  You just can’t have it all all the time.

So, go ahead and eat the Doritos.

~FB

PS I’m not affiliated with Doritos

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Chocolate Recovery

Yesterday was my first day to myself and to relax in weeks.  I stayed home all day. I avoided the hustle and bustle of sale shoppers and basically vegged out all day on my couch.  Okay, okay, I did do a cardio yoga workout and had a visit from my parents, but aside from that I vegged out on my couch for most of the day.

After a while I got pretty bored – I’m not used to having this much down time – and I ate.  I ate a lot of chocolate.  I mean, not hordes of it but more chocolate than I usually would eat.

ahhh....chocolate heaven

ahhh….chocolate heaven

I inherited my chocoholism from my dad….there are times when I can go weeks or months without a piece, but then there are times when I’m rooting through the cupboards hoping for a stash.

And with Christmas just a few days behind us the chocolate is bountiful.  So today I’ve sworn myself off chocolate.  I have a healthy balanced lunch packed for the work day, a yummy, mouth-watering berry smoothie waiting to be guzzled this morning, and after teaching boot camp class tonight I’ll find something replenishing for a late dinner.

See…I am human and I like to indulge.  It’s fine to indulge.  As long as our indulgences don’t happen every day or all day long.  I’m more than happy to live a little.  It’s going to make me work harder tonight and eat healthier today.

~Fit Bitch